James Malinchak's Networking Development Suggestions

By Troy Dickson


Networking is communicating to create mutually beneficial relationships.

People often mistake networking with "quantity of contacts." However, the purpose of networking is simply to enhance your cause. Think of networking as the opening of doors to the unknown. You may be tempted to believe the more doors you've got, the greater the odds you'll make the right kinds of connections, but that is incorrect. Networking is intentional by design. By placing yourself in situations that attract others with whom mutually beneficial relationships can be established, you increase the potential payoffs. Therefore, one of the primary traits of the networking leader is the ability to identify which doors to open.

Tip No. 1 - Do Your Homework

Because planning is an element of networking, you will need to make lists and seek out resources that can answer basic questions about the person or organization you will be meeting. For instance, who knows the person you're trying to meet? Who else works with this person? Where do they live? I'm not suggesting you stalk your prospective pool of networking targets; rather, sit down and list the information that will help increase the quality of your potential interactions.

I realized the importance of doing your homework when I had the opportunity to have dinner with author Mary Higgins Clark. Inspite of the many possible ways of learning more about my renowned upcoming dinner host, time required that I select only a few. Step one was a trip to my neighborhood bookstore-a place of considerable networking resources. I asked the individual working behind the counter if she had ever heard of Mary Higgins Clark. "Oh yes," she answered as she pointed to a display holding more than 10 of her books. Now I felt anxious; in spite of my desire to read what seemed to be stacks upon stacks of her best-selling novels, I purchased only three to read on the plane. As I left the bookstore, I found myself less anxious and more excited about my upcoming encounter.

Tip No. 2 - Take the Initiative and Introduce Yourself

When meeting someone of influence, it's natural to be nervous about making a bad first impression, irrespective of your own level of success. Even the most charismatic people say the wrong things out of nervousness or excitement. I think it's always wise to depend on politeness. This seems like an apparent suggestion until you mistakenly call somebody by her first name after a 2-minute introduction. Whether the person you're approaching is famous or not, it's always acceptable to ask, "How would you like to be addressed?" after introducing yourself. I also like to have a couple of questions in mind that begin with the phrase, "Tell me about...," followed by a reference to something I know about the person. Most people like to talk about themselves. Therefore, the more the conversation places focus on your new acquaintance, not why they should be thrilled to meet you, the more likely there is going to be another encounter.

Fortunately, I did not have to make any decisions about how to approach my dinner host since Mary Higgins Clark greeted me as I approached her home. Still outside, Mary and I talked about a host of topics from our families and hobbies to the stock market. She was particularly interested in the market. She asked questions that, frankly, were rather complicated to answer. Instead of trying to impress her (a mistake often made when trying to make a good impression), I responded to her questions with candid, easy-to-understand answers.

Tip No. 3 - Make it About Them

You never want to try to make yourself sound better, smarter or more knowledgeable than your partners in conversation. When you do this, you appear to condescend and, despite your desire to build a foundation for additional interaction, you may have just closed the door. In fact, it should be your goal to ask more questions than you answer. Keep the other person engaged in the conversation by having them share information about themselves. Find a common interest. Lastly, do what is needed to appear approachable. Offering your business card is just one way to ensure this happens.

Much to my delight, my utilization of effective networking skills with Mary Higgins Clark was instantly rewarded. For instance, as I was leaving after a great evening of conversation over a New England dinner, Mary asked if she can speak with me for a moment. I walked with her to the corner of the room where she said, "I really like you and how effortlessly you explained the answers to my questions. I'm planning to open an investment account with another company, and I'd like to open the account with you."

Tip No. 4 - Stay in Frequent Contact

Why did this happen? Just because I took the initiative to stay in touch and follow up with her. There are lots of ways you can do this follow up. Writing thank you cards, sending articles of interest with a note or remembering events of importance with flowers are all instances of frequent contact methods. Sending an e-mail message-although impersonal when compared to a letter-also keeps your name and contact information out there. Call particular contacts periodically and, if you happen to be in their area, take them to lunch or give them a quick call to say hello.

Tip No. 5 - Look for Ways to Offer Praise

Making others feel good about themselves is essential for walking through doors once they have been opened. Congratulating someone for accomplishments or thanking them for taking the time to speak with you are ways to praise. This does not mean you should act like a crazed fan; rather, think about what you could say that would make the other person feel good about themselves. Praising your own accomplishments can lead to a competitive tone in your conversations. Having a calm sense of self while praising others makes you appear self-confident and much more worthy of additional contacts.

Why is networking essential for creating success and wealth? The answer is simple. It is not a coincidence that hundreds, even thousands, of people are hired for positions over individuals who are more qualified and more experienced merely because they have cultivated relationships with key centers of influence. It is not a coincidence when one politician is elected into office over another because he has cultivated relationships with more individual voters than the opposition. Through networking, you will receive opportunities that will expand your current knowledge base. Through networking, you will be in positions to expand your current skills and learn to communicate at many levels.




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